'Thank you' - a practiced art

We hear a lot about giving, don't we?
To give is better than to receive, we're taught.
Give from the heart.
Give and it shall be given unto you.
Give 'til it hurts (because that's where the sacrifice is.)
Taking, on the other hand, seems to be a bad word.
It can be.
But graceful, grateful receiving is an unpracticed art.

When I invited myself to lunch with friends, I expected to pay and came prepared to do so. But when I reached for "the card," I was told, "No, it's taken care of."
That's when my little voice inside said, "Accepting gifts is a way of blessing the giver."
I said 'thank you' without protest.

In a short Letter to the Editor, a member of Roberts Tabernacle church in Shelby thanks her pastor and his family for what some might say was an unusual act.
The Jerry Webbs served each member breakfast before and lunch after the July 20 worship time.

Jesus told a story about 10 men healed. Only one returned to thank him.
How often do we 'take' a gift with no acknowledgement...

I believe if I practice the art of graceful, grateful receiving - quite a different concept than soliciting - the world and those in it around me will benefit.

Each day a gift

Evelyn Kennedy's birthday party last week was a true celebration of life. Death is not far away, the 57-year-old believes, because her body is racked with pancreatic cancer. Apparently there's no cancer in her spirit and her sense of fun is still quite intact.
Take the 10-pound sombrero she donned with grace - if not so much with confidence as it wobbled about - as friends sang and cheered and urged her to take the first piece of cake for herself.
Remember to count your blessings today.
See the glass half full, not half empty.
Touch someone with your smile.
You know that smiling at those who think they're your enemies drives them nuts!
:)

True celebration of life

I'm invited to a birthday party today.
By most accounts, this looks to be the last birthday Evelyn Kennedy may have in this world, but I fully expect a joyous time.
What an inspiration to meet and get to know Evie, as many friends call her. Her no-holds-barred approach to living life and to dying - what can I say? I believe God has gifted her with special insight and that she can say, along with the late Dr. Carl Naman, that it's a win-win situation: If you live, you get to be with friends and family. If you die, you get to be face to face with God.
Now that's a good reason to celebrate.
I'll let you know how the party goes!

On the road again - or not

If a blown head gasket means nothing to you, that is, if it's something you know how to deal with, you might want to check out what I've been seeing on Kings Road.
Big orange emergency cones and a hand-scrawled sign draw attention to this car.
My auto experiences range from bending the A frame on my brand new car decades ago through pushing numerous VW bugs down the hill to start them to enduring two and a half summers with no A/C in my truck. None of that was fun.
But if car tinkering sets your soul on fire, go for it!

Silly Putty

Ever feel like Silly Putty? I mean the part where you can get pulled in so many directions you don't have a real shape anymore? I get that way with more and more regularity these days.
No easy answer, is there?
Trying to stay focused under my own power....not working!
But when I remember that I am clay but that I am not the potter, things improve - my mind clears, my focus returns.
That's pretty important for someone whose job is to impart information to other people.
It's even more important when you have family to care for, friends to respond to and a world to come to grips with.
I thank my Creator every day that he is who he is and I don't have to be in charge!

Squint and you can see them

More travels with Cassie:
On my way home recently, a family of four rudely ran out in the road in front of me.
But there was no skidding, no squealing brakes, no horn blowing or shouting, because I'm usually a rational driver. And no, I didn't hit them.
Indeed, this stop had me saying, "Oh, how beautiful!"
Wearing what could be mistaken for burglar masks Papa and Mama waddled across Kings Road, with two fuzzy babies pattering behind.
Look closely, because as I stopped to capture them (digitally, of course) they intentionally kept a fairly non-photographable distance.
Just one more of God's little surprises in my life. Thanks!

How much is that doggie?

Driving to the office and back home again is usually the same-old-same-old. So I really slowed down to look when I saw a big brown object by the roadside.
I still couldn't tell exactly what it was, so I stopped, turned around and went back a few driveways. Still not completely sure, so I got out of the truck and walked up to this adorable soft creature with a piece of paper stuck to his head.
For Sale - $20.
That was a week ago, and I saw him a few times since, but not this morning. Hope he didn't run away.

De-bugged

The little things that bug me are becoming less and less important.
And the little things that fascinate me are getting moreso.
Take this little lady bug, for instance. Yes, she's there on the rose - look more closely.
I cut some blooms from a sprawl of roses in my back yard. I didn't plant them, but inherited them when we moved to this house about four years ago. I have helped them a little by giving them space and getting competition out of the way, but they truly are a gift.
Nestled in a bulb vase on my kitchen table, the flowers made me happy. The day after I brought them in, I noticed something moving on a glossy green leaf.
She mesmerized me as she trailed along every petal edge in her quest for I-don't-know-what. She kept at it so long, I fetched my cellphone camera, then propped on the table edge waiting for just the right moment to capture her - digitally. She eventually made her way to the window, where she camped out a few days, then disappeared.
I remember her fondly.

A time to sow and a time to reap

All was quiet as I drove by the Northeast Shelby Weed and Seed Community Garden about an hour ago. By 6 p.m., the site should be buzzing with activity. Anyone interested in helping weed, clear, plant more or just hang out with neighbors is welcome to join in the second annual official planting day. Brings your rakes, hoes and gloves and the community spirit!

Life grip

Dying versus staying alive. It’s a win-win situation, Dr. Carl Naman told me in
September 2006.
“If we live, we get to be with family and friends,” Naman said. “If we die, we get to be with God.”
The beloved surgeon went "to be with God" Friday night, May 30.
In his three decades caring for patients in and around Cleveland County, he demonstrated a feverish tenacity for life by keeping vigils with and staying close to the people he served. That same life grip carried him through years of illness with the same zest for living.
Friends and colleagues remember him with love. Read what they say here and in Wednesday's Star.

For the full September 2006 story:
http://www.shelbystar.com/news/naman_3774___article.html/hospice_mcswain.html

Counting

Just got back from filling in the little eggs on my ballot and I feel important.
My vote counts just as much as anyone else's!
I mean, I'm up there at my precinct - the 50-year-old Cleveland Volunteer Fire Department - rubbing elbows with a former mayor and a district attorney - as well as mainstream folks I've never met before, taking advantage of a right that millions in countries around the world would give treasures to have.
I mean, I walked without fear the block-and-a-half from The Star to Shelby Precinct No. 2 - no fear of kidnapping (like some children in Uganda), unafraid of attack, no bombs exploding.
I mean, if you're reading this and have yet to make your mark - get up and do it!
Casting your vote in America is a time-honored tradition (with a flawed history to be sure, but far and away better than the alternative.)

Another tradition morphs tonight here in Shelby.
No scaffolding, no humongous blackboard, no George pacing back and forth with the chalk in his hand.
Locals congregating at the above mentioned Cleveland Volunteer Fire Department for blow-by-blow election results will still be able to see them, but the big blackboard is apparently an icon of history.
Elections Director Debra Blanton said, "Election Night results will no longer be written on the blackboard."
Instead, Daryl Sando, staff member of the Cleveland County Electronics Department, will project results directly from the Board of Elections Web site onto the fire department's widescreen TV.
Technology marches on.

No superhighway to heaven

Your faith journey,
Pastor Don Margarita told a full house at this week's Community Lenten lunchtime service, will probably feel nothing like the smooth traveling you can sometimes find along I-85 (when you're not in a rush-hour crunch).
No, a real faith journey is a Bette Davis special - "Hang on, it's going to be a bumpy ride," - potholes, narrow lanes, hairpin turns and roadblocks of every description.
To learn how to be a disciple, it's really necessary that you develop discipline and keep working to refine it each mile along the way. Often painful steps and slow.
Webster calls discipline "training that develops self-control."
A more precise meaning for someone on the faith journey might be "training that develops God-control."
Margarita said discipline helps you reassess the meaning of faith. Spiritual growth takes place painfully and slowly and requires self-denial.
What does that mean?
How about this - what is in your life now that you could/would/should set aside just to have the time and focus to get to know God better?

That goal is at the top of my list in making better use of my time and shedding my cloak of procrastination.

Quality not quantity

I've often struggled with the question of my need vs. others' needs.
I know the intimate details of jump-starting a car downhill, heating water for a child's bath on a electric stove because the gas got cut off and stretching my cooking creativity to the limit when the cupboard looked bare.
Many moons ago, most of these difficulties, yet still vivid in my mind.
Over the years, I've fared better, but as we all do, still face hard times in one way or another. Some days, I start to feel really "needy."
But being in need of one sort or another does not mean that you have nothing to give others.
You accept the hand, the help, the love and prayers offered for you, and you give the hand, the help, the love and prayers to others at the same time.
Balance, that's what life needs, and you're capable of achieving it.
And when God looks at your gift, whatever it is, he's looking for quality and sacrifice. That's what alms-giving is about for me.

Alms - the gift of yourself

I share today the words of Henri Nouwen:

Consolation is a beautiful word. It means "to be" (con-) "with the lonely one" (solus). To offer consolation is one of the most important ways to care. Life is so full of pain, sadness, and loneliness that we often wonder what we can do to alleviate the immense suffering we see.
We can and must offer consolation. We can and must console the mother who lost her child, the young person with AIDS, the family whose house burned down, the soldier who was wounded, the teenager who contemplates suicide, the old man who wonders why he should stay alive.

To console does not mean to take away the pain but rather to be there and say, "You are not alone, I am with you. Together we can carry the burden. Don't be afraid. I am here."
That is consolation. We all need to give it as well as to receive it.

Nouwen's words give shape to my feelings.
And they again demonstrate that "almsgiving" is not about money - but does lend itself to discussion of a financial concept. That concept is investment.
Don't have $$$ to invest in helping someone else? Look to what you do have:
A little time
A shoulder
An ear
Arms to reach around someone
Pen and paper to send a note
or just a smile - a simple act for you could be an incredible gift to another.

40 days of baring my soul

People who observe Lent are supposed to use the time between Ash Wednesday and Easter to look at themselves hard and to acknowledge their weaknesses, failures and sins.
Looking's not so bad. Most of know who we are and who we aren't. Most can recite easily our sins of commission and of omission.
Procrastination - putting things off - lurks constantly near the top of my list, even leers at me from the bathroom mirror.

But then comes the next step - acknowledging those sins and faults - first to yourself and then to God.
And the hardest step of all - change.
My Lenten goal is to grow my respect for other people's time, which means I should be on time - or heavenly surprise, early - when I've committed to doing something or being somewhere.

How do you start hitting God's mark for your life - his bull's eye, as Father Michael Kottar from St. Mary's Catholic Church phrased it at the Community Ash Wednesday service this week.
Sin equals missing the mark.
How do you change that?
Through prayer, which Kottar admitted is hard work. Your conversations with God require faith and honesty - not that God doesn't know all about you anyway, but he needs YOU to be able to see what he sees.
Through penance or mortification - a formal word with a simple meaning: Die to the things that tie you to this world.
Kottar says "detach ourselves from our own likes and dislikes, to please God. This is a powerful reminder that we are here to give the glory to God, not ourselves.
Through almsgiving: This is not just giving money to the church or dropping coins in the Poor Box. It's more about giving yourself, about helping others in need, with money, if that's the need and you have it, but also with time - an ear or a shoulder - and compassion.

Lent begins with a service when worshipers are marked with a cross of ashes, which may seem morbid or sad.
But it's true nature, Kottar says, brings joy and hope that the grace of God is with us. The ashes represent who we are without God - dust to dust. But ashes are not our future when we commit our lives to God.

By commiting to pray about my time, die to my selfishness with the hours I'm given, and share my alms with those in need who cross my path, I'll be reaching for that joy and hope.

What are you hoping for in your spiritual walk?

Lent and the Scarlett O'Hara syndrome

The first thing I committed to giving up for Lent is procrastination.
Well, it's the day AFTER Ash Wednesday and I'd planned to start this blog yesterday.
Let's hope my next 39 days are more fruitful.
Hope - now there's a word that can be interpreted a couple of ways.
I hope it snows.
I hope we get pizza for lunch.
I hope I can keep up with this schedule.
Those are wishes with little substance to propel them.
My hope is in God.
Now that is something I can count on, because God is someone I can count on. I believe that hope as it relates to God is a certainty, a promise.
Hope through God means that snow or not, I can have joy in each day God creates.
Whether lunch is pizza, pinto beans or nothing, I still have food for my soul.
And hope means that when I lean on God's power instead of my own, I'll be able to fulfill my commitments far beyond my meager expectations.
Procrastination used to be one of my father's favorite words. I guess he used it so much because I've always been a master - much like our beloved Scarlett - at putting things off.
"I'll think about that tomorrow," or next week, or next month, or never.
That is not really how I've wanted to be, but when you tend to make mountains out of ant hills...
I make strides from time to time, but my personal goal is to eliminate the habit.
If you will, watch this space from now to Easter, check back with me often and hold me accountable.